Endless Thoughts (Part 2)

From IKTWiki

By Lily Chang

Translated by Angel Teng

The Sweet Farewell (溫馨盛情的送別)

When we have finally found you after your accident, the Tzu Chi members have first volunteered to arrange your shrine at our house. They have brought fresh flowers, fruits and things for the setup. Later many more friends from Tzu Chi, Buddha’s Light Association and I-Kuan Tao had come to recite the holy scriptures for you. When Venerable Hui Fang, Venerable Yuang Chia, as well as uncles and aunties from Buddha’s Light Association heard of your accident, they have all rushed their way to come pay their homage to you. You were so fortunate that Venerable Hui Li had conducted the memorial service for you. Venerable Hui Li, is the South Africa Buddha’s Light Association’s first abbot (Fo Guang Shan, Nan Hua Temple), he has dedicated his life to toil in propagating Buddhism in Africa, highly respected as a Buddhism Venerable and loved by Africa people.

In order to recite "The True Sutra of Mi-Lei Buddha" perfectly in your funeral, the I-Kuan Tao members had countless rehearsals before the memorial service. The youth Tao members, whom were responsible to guard your coffin on your day of service, had practiced through out the nights too. The South Africa Toa Association counselor - transmit teacher Ling, as well as all Temple owners and other Tao members from all Tao groups, had all put aside their personal affairs and came to assist in the preparation of your service. Your God-brother George had asked for a long personal leave, your God-sister Jenny had come back all the way from America and your dearest sister was there to escort the entire service. The senior transmit teacher Chen, transmit teacher Yang, Temple owner - Uncle Yeh, Temple owner - Aunty Yin, Lecture Yin, sister Mei-Miao and sister Ling have all come from Taiwan. They have all wanted to be with you on your last stage of your life.

January 31st: Our flight from South Africa was delayed when arriving in Taiwan. Transmit teachers, temple owners, as well as Tao members from groups of Chi-Chu, Fa-Yi, Bao-kuang, Tian-Jen, and family friends have come from all corners of Taiwan (Taipei, Taichung, Chiayi & Kaohsiung), they have waited for your arrival at the Taoyuan International Airport. Later, they have all accompanied you to the Congenital Ashes Pagoda (where Danny’s ash was going to be placed) at the Zhong Shu Temple. It was the temporary placement date for your ash urn. According to Chinese tradition, your official placement date was arranged later on February 9th. Even though the official day was cold and raining, the same groups of Tao members and friends have all come again for the actual ceremony. My family is truly grateful to them, for the love and supports that they have given!

The Holy Grace of God (蒙母無上恩典)

Danny, you were such a crying boy before the age of three. However, during your Tao receiving ceremony (similar as baptism in Christianity) at age of one, you were full of happy smiles. Many elders were amazed and believed that you must be someone very special from God (you have always loved to sit with your legs crossed— Just like Buddha does). When we had decided to immigrate to South Africa, you were very young at that time but you were worried what would happen to the Buddha status that we worship at home. What a special boy you were! Now, even after passing away, you were smart in finding ways to speak to us through your Aunt (whom can sense the spirit), so to let us know that your will was to rest in the Congenital Ashes Pagoda. At first, I didn’t think it was suitable for your ashes to be placed in Taiwan. But since there is no I-Kuan Tao Ashes Pagoda in South Africa, I then have agreed with your choice after careful consideration. It is Holy Grace from God that you would be able to rest in his arms, embraced by the mercy of our Senior Patriarch, and lighten upon by the great virtues of Patriarch Zhang and Matriarch Sun. You are truly fortunate to continue your learning of Dharma and to guard the Tao society in this way. On the day of your actual ashes placement, I have dreamed of you waving good-bye at me with your smiling face before dawn. Few days later, your holy revelation of peaceful scent in the ashes pagoda, had made me wonder if I should stay in Taiwan so that I could be with you. But once again, you spoke to me through Aunty Yu, expressing that you had wanted me to return to South Africa. I have made my promise to you that I would return as you wished, then Aunty Yu said your spirit had left smilingly (Aunty Yu could sense the spirit too, but we didn’t know her before).

The most outstanding Introducer: Mr. R-N Chen (he is a temple owner). Your uncle Chen, is Teng family’s introducer for three generations. When you first left Taiwan, you were only 120cm tall. But few years later, when you saw Uncle Chen again in South Africa you had said to him, "Uncle, you have gotten shorter!" I said to you laughingly, "No my son, it is you that got much taller!" You know what? When you translated for your uncle while he presents his Tao lectures, did you know how proud he was of you? After your sudden passing, your uncle had wanted to comfort me not to grief too much. But he himself was actually crying helplessly! Your uncle Chen was someone that has seen you grown since you were a baby. We have even made an agreement with him before, that he would be your children’s introducer one day…but now it is not possible anymore!

Ambassador Du and Section Chief of Taipei Liaison Office in the RSA, as well as RSA Parliament Member - Ms. Chen and the heads of Chinese Associations, many friends and family members have devoted their heart and soul for your memorial service. Especially your Uncle Lo, there isn’t enough word to express our appreciation for him. Without his supports, our family wouldn’t be at where we are today! He had stretched out his hand in everyway he could to help our family; it even included your memorial service. After your funeral, he had said in sorrow, "When I die one day, I don’t know if I would have the honor to have such solemn memorial service like the one Danny had today…" It was truly honorable to have friends from five major religions and different nationalities at your service. Danny, you should know that you had everyone’s love. The Teng family would like to take this opportunity to express our deepest gratitude to everyone whom had loved and cared for Danny!

A life (震撼超然的生命)

Oh, Danny! You have proven that, "The value of life is not the length of its time, but is the meaning of its existence for others." In a Tao seminar held in 2004, Chi-Kung Living Buddha mercifully made a holy revelation (channeling through media), telling us the shock brought by Danny’s death was part of his plan to fulfill his holy vow for the last salvation, for all sentient beings that have affinity with Buddha, Danny wanted to manifest that "Tao is true, the Way is true, and the Heavenly Decree is true." After conveying this message, now he returns to heaven in a natural and carefree manner. He has not only successfully fulfilled his holy mission, but also reached his ultimate enlightenment in heaven. In that seminar, Chi-Kung Living Buddha also urged me to turn my sorrow into a driving force, making the most of my limited lifetime and put in my utmost effort in Tao cultivation, so as to help to build a pure land of Mi-Lei. For this divine cause, I now have no right to withdraw, but to move on bravely.

I have made a promise to Chi-Kung Buddha back in the Tao seminar that was held in 2000. I have promised him I would never let him down. Later in the 2004 Tao Seminar, Chi-Kung Buddha had encouraged me by saying he needs my assistant in propagating Tao in South Africa…how merciful is Chi-Kung Buddha! How fortunate I am to be loved and expected greatly by the Holy Teacher! Now looking back on my life, I have reached my fifty. Bustled through my life, I have learned that the road of Tao cultivation is not easy at all, but it is the only way that would lead us back to heaven. My Tao heart that was once on the edge of breaking into pieces was able to find its way back to its life position through editing Danny’s memorial articles. Suddenly, the holy obligation that I felt before were awakened! Real life does not have a script and it has no rehearsals too. Moreover, there is no chance to start over. All you could do is making the most of what you have right now, and put your heart into actions. Even if the ending is not perfect, at least you have devoted everything you could, that way life would have no regrets!

I would like to dedicate this piece to all whom may be suffering spiritually at this moment. May you find freedom, comfort and be reunited with your family.

This writing is to be mailed for my dearest son far in heaven!

Thinking of you,

Love Mommy

(at my 50th Birthday) 2006

• If you wish to know more about Danny’s story or you would like to share with us your feelings, please email us at：danny23040108_931217@hotmail.com

(The End)

道不盡的思念(二)

溫馨盛情的送別

出事以後，找到你回家後的靈堂，是慈濟的師伯幫你安置、師姑為你準備鮮花、水果，還有師伯、師姑、叔叔、阿姨、慈青、佛青、道青和好友們為你助念……慧昉住持、永家法師、佛光山疼愛你的師伯、師姑、師兄、師姐、佛青等同修，他們一聽到你出狀況，都不辭辛勞從遠方趕回來為你加持。慧禮法師是佛光山在南非的開荒始祖、奔波於非洲道場，你又是何等榮幸，因緣際會下「告別式」由他主法。（他是德高望眾的非洲開荒高僧）

一貫道的道親更為了在你的告別式中，朗誦好「彌勒真經」，每位參與者汗流浹背地練唱，道青們為了扶靈儀式徹夜演練。一貫道南非聯誼會顧問林副總點傳師、各組線壇主、道親都放下手邊工作來幫忙籌備，乾哥喬治為你請了長假、乾姐美如遠從美國回來、姊姊（你累世的兄弟）更是全程護航。陳老點傳師、楊點傳師、葉壇主阿伯、尹壇主阿姨、尹講師、美妙姐姐、慧玲姐姐他們專程從台灣來送你最後一程。

1月31日你要暫厝在先天寶塔，抵達台灣時因為班機延誤，讓大家等候多時。2月9日是安座的日子，接機和安座這兩次當中，均有基礎組、發一組、寶光組、天真總壇組的點傳師、壇主、和親朋好友們遠從台北、台中、嘉義、高雄舟車勞頓至桃園中正機場接你，再陪同到忠恕道院先天寶塔，安座當天既寒冷又下著大雨，竭誠的感恩大家……

蒙母無上恩典

三歲以前的你是整天在哭，但在週歲時於求道儀式中卻法喜充滿，讓認識你的長輩們嘖嘖稱奇：凱鴻這孩子來歷非凡……（從小你總是盤腿而席）。離開台灣時，年幼的你竟然懂得憂心家裡恭奉的佛祖要如何安置……你是如此不平凡啊！如今，聰慧的你透過表舅媽讓我們知道，希望身後安奉在先天寶塔內，當時媽媽也捨不得讓你隻身回台，但是南非目前尚未有一貫道寶塔位，幾經研討後，同意了你的選擇，因為能時時沐浴在 皇慈懷、祖師鴻慈、師尊、師母大德之佛光普照下，聽經聞法、護持道場，那會是無上幸受的恩典啊！安座那天黎明前，媽媽於睡夢中看到你笑咪咪的跟我揮手，以及塔位內溢出芳香的顯化。當我猶豫是否滯留台灣時，你透過游媽媽告訴我，要我先回南非，游媽媽說當我允諾回南非時，你即笑咪咪地離開。（儘管之前我們跟游媽媽並不認識）

最稱職的引師：陳壇主瑞能阿伯、他是鄧家祖孫三代的引師，當你離開台灣時身高只有120公分，阿伯蒞臨南非時你說：「阿伯您變矮了！」我說：「兒子啊！是你長高了！」你知道嗎？當阿伯講課時，你在旁幫他翻譯，他多高興！ 當你辭別塵寰、駕返理天時，阿伯安慰我：勿傷悲！他自己卻淚涔涔！（他是這樣看著你長大，我們曾約定請他當你未來兒女的引師啊！）

中華民國駐南非杜大使、聯絡處莊處長、南非國會議員陳阡蕙，及各僑團的僑領和好友們，以及你的師長、同學都為你盡心盡力，尤其是我們的大恩人－－羅伯伯明煌先生，由衷感恩他，當年若不是他的鼎力相助，哪裡有今天的我們！包括你的後事也要阿伯幫忙費心……當他為你辦完後事，心疼的說：「以後我走了可能沒有凱鴻的這麼隆重……」因為來參加你告別式的，囊括五大宗教及不同國籍的好友，前塵往事湧上心頭、不勝枚舉，凱鴻啊！你是集三千寵愛於一身！僅此向所有愛護凱鴻的前賢大德們由衷致謝。

震撼超然的生命

凱鴻啊！你做到「人存在的價值不在於生命的長短，而是他人在乎他存在的意義」於2004年法會，濟公活佛慈悲賜導：凱鴻臨終的震撼是乘愿而來的，以出世慧命的體悟，勉勵有情的眾生，印證道真、理真、天命真。現在他自然地、瀟灑地回天繳旨，道成天上，要我化悲憤為力量，更應把握有限的生命，開啟成就自己的心靈寶山、創造修持的彌勒淨土，沒有後退的權利，只有勇往直前的愿力！

後學於2000年法會時曾向老師承諾，不會讓他失望！2004年法會時，老師再度說他需要我的幫忙……師恩浩瀚！後學何德何能！讓恩師如此器重。暮然回首，已經50歲了，汲汲營營一輩子，「道高一尺，而魔卻有千丈高！」瀕臨破碎邊緣的道心，因為整理凱鴻的紀念文章而找到生命的立足點，原有的使命感瞬間被震醒！真實的人生是沒有劇本、沒有彩排，更不能重來，唯有把握當下，用心去落實在行動上，即使結局不是很完美，但至少已盡心盡力了，人生也就沒有遺憾了！ 僅此略盡微薄心意，虔誠祝福心靈受苦的人都能得到自在、輕安、闔家團圓。

遙寄給遠方的寶貝兒子！

思念你的媽咪寫於50歲生日2006

Source

Excerpt from Foundation Monthly, 219, pp. 38-42 & 217, pp. 26-31, March, 2007.